is this you?

I work especially well with people who can't help but question the way things "are," are as interested in asking the right questions as they are in getting handed the answers, are not in thrall to authority—including mine—and have their own well-developed, idiosyncratic ways of thinking about things. (If you don't have that last part together yet, fear not... I'm really good at helping people find that in themselves).

About half of the people I work with are therapy veterans—people who have tried therapy in the past and found it awkward, stagnant, underwhelming, or, frankly, boring—and are now wanting to do a different, more intensive, kind of work on themselves.

Some others, therapy novices, wind up in my office as a complete last resort, after they've exhausted all of their self-directed options and realized they need another perspective on things. A subset of this group is pushed into therapy by important people in their lives, and is often, unsurprisingly, less than enthusiastic about the idea. When that's the case it's my job to help them find their own motivations for sticking with it—to make working with me their choice, and not their significant others’-- and to encourage them to leave if we can't find any. I'm told it's unusual that I actually enjoy working with these people, which is probably a big part of what keeps my grudging-attender-to-willing-participant conversion rate high.

A third group aren't entirely sure how to verbalize their reasons for coming to see me, but are having concerns about decisions they are making, their sense of themselves, or the overall ways in which they are living their lives. Simply stated, they are looking for something, are not sure exactly what, yet sense that I may be able to help them find it.

I tend to get along especially well with these groups of people—therapy skeptics, all—because I'm not conventionally therapy-ish, or one-size-fits-all-ish, in my approach: yes, of course, I'll listen to you, ask you questions, look for patterns in your behavior and interpret what you say... but I'll also hold up my end of the conversation, acknowledge that I'm a real person, and, as such, tell you what I really think.